When I looked up the definition of compassion I came across some different interpretations:
“sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others”
“compassion motivates people to go out of their way to help the physical, mental or emotional pains of another and themselves”
“to love together with”
And when I looked up some synonyms, I came up with: warmth, love, tenderness, consideration, tolerance, kindness, humanity, charity, benevolence.
For me, compassion is a mix of all of this along with a very clear action orientation. It is not only about empathy (another word that comes up), but empathy with action. To have compassion, to be compassionate means that you will do something about what you are seeing and hearing that is in the interest of that person and relieving suffering.
Not so many months ago, the current US administration, allowed young children crossing the border illegally with their parents to be forcibly separated from them. There was a huge national and international hoohah and eventually something was done to stop that from happening.
Now, each country has to decide for itself what its laws are around illegal immigration and I am in no way making any point here about that. However what was missing in the way the law was executed was compassion. Removing children from their parents causes suffering all round, but especially for the children who are plunged into a sense of fear, danger, uncertainty, physical and emotional pain.
Being compassionate means that you are able to put yourself in the shoes of others, walk a mile or two in them and feel what they feel, see what they see, hear what they hear and therefore understand what they believe and the purpose behind the actions they take, the behaviour that you see. And it then enables you to respond in a way that can alleviate the pain, the situation and more.
SO WHY IS IT AN IMPORTANT LEADERSHIP SKILL?
We are living through times of unprecedented change and we are all having to adapt to that pace of change. Some will do so easier than others, some will be driving the change and others will feel insecure, unsafe, challenged beyond what they can cope with. Being compassionate is essential to make sure that all your people find a way to navigate the change and come out the other side having contributed also.
Along with this change comes fear which leads to protectionism, which leads to extreme movements based on this fear and non-understanding. We need leaders who can see and value the differences, who are willing to understand and find ways to resolve conflicts and this requires compassion and compassionate acts.
At whatever level – whether we are talking about international and national politics, corporations, small businesses, schools, local communities, wherever. Compassion will lead to understanding, to collaboration, to community, to more rather than less.
And something that I nearly forgot to include…. Technology is advancing and increasing the speed of change today and in many situations it is becoming the change itself. As human beings we will need to leverage and become more proficient at those things that make us uniquely human – the act of compassion is something we might share with others in the animal kingdom, but is something that machines do not have – yet..
HOW WILL YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE DEVELOPED IT?
You will have:
A greater understanding rooted in experience that there are different ways to view the world and that they are all “real”
- The ability to resolve conflicts, foster collaboration
- People saying thank you in so many ways
- People surprising you in many others
- A deeper understanding of what it is to be human
- What else will show you that you have developed more compassion? Does compassion mean something else to you?
As ever, please join me in this discussion below and do share with those you believe will be interested
